My wife has recently developed an interest in magic. Not just any old magic, but the street magic of a certain Cyril Takayama.
The dashing illusionist of Ryukyuan and French descent has been seen on cable TV doing his street magic in cities like Taipei.
The man would cook instant noodles with just cold water in front of young people at Xi Men Ding shopping district, or do some coin thing in a fancy club with some sexy woman as his ooh-ahh target.
The wife was so fascinated with his brand of magic that she went online to hunt down his YouTube videos, most of which were from his programs in Japan.
"No, lah, I like him for his magic only," my wife said to me when I came home one evening and caught her transfixed on the television.
"And he is half Japanese and half French," she continued, "but he speaks perfect English and Japanese."
I muttered something about all this being just tricks and looked at the TV trying to dissect how he does his illusions, while the wife oohed and ahhed along with the ladies in the program.
"He's born in 1973, you know," she offered helpfully then giggled with a tinge of guilt.
"How you know so much? They mention his year of birth on TV ah?" I said teasingly.
"No lah, his magic is very fun to watch. But I think his good looks also help to distract his audience while he does his sleight of hand," said the wife.
Of course it is perfectly ok for wives to ogle good-looking magicians. If I had the same interest in the magic of some scantily clad babe magician on TV, I would have a lot of explaining to do.
And the wife would never believe me if I told her I like a lady magician because of the things she does with her rack... no no, I meant that trick where she escapes from being tied to a rack!
I would be put into a box and cut in half, except in my case, I wouldn't be joined back.
I wonder if learning magic is a great way to pick up women. I am sure Cyril does not have any problem with the ladies. The man can do a lame trick like the moving thumb one (I am still getting a lot of mileage from that trick, with my kids) and the women will still swoon.
No, I am talking about the less hunk-like among us. Perhaps there should be a course for single men to learn how to impress the ladies with magic.
Think of the opportunities that can open up if one learns the Dark Arts of Coin Manipulation. Women will totally throw themselves at you if you can make a coin appear from behind their ears. Since the dawn of time, cavemen have impressed cavewomen with similar magic (except they pulled boulders from out of women's ears, a somewhat harder trick).
Guys can confidently walk into a bar and strike up a conversation with any lady they fancy, knowing that their offer to show them a card trick or two will always be a winning hand.
Sure, a less cosmopolitan woman might find you psycho for walking around with a pack of playing cards in your pocket just to do tricks. And a less sophisticated chick may think you nuts for having a rabbit on hand at all times to pull one out of her handbag at will. But most women will be impressed by your sua-vay ways, to quote the French.
You can also do tricks like ask her to write her phone number on a piece of paper, then you crush it up and eat it, then three days later she receives hourly calls from you asking her out. Like magic!
I am telling you, becoming a street magician is the ticket to transforming you from David Plain to David Blaine in no time! Go from Serial Loser to Cyril Takayama!
If you can't find a special magic course for single men, don't worry. Just keep watching the likes of Cyril on TV. Maybe start by buying some of his garish shirts and wearing those to your next social gathering at a club.
And start with something simple — ask the ladies if they want to see you make your thumb come off.
mrbrown aka Mr Kin Mun LEE is the accidental author of the popular Singapore website, mrbrown.com, and has been documenting the dysfunctional side of Singapore life since 1997.
Affectionately known as the Blogfather of Singapore, his readers follow his writings closely, which these days range from current affairs, his family, and even his trips abroad.
Currently, mrbrown also hosts the mrbrown show (mrbrownshow.com), probably Singapore's best known comedy and satire podcast.
mrbrown is married to Ginny, his long-suffering wife for 12 years, and is father to three lovely kids, Faith, Isaac and Joy.
For your magic needs, please check out inSing.com’s listing of magic supply stores: